Cultivate your authentic self

While we may not be able to change someone else’s authenticity, we can certainly change ours. Feeling the need to “put on a mask” is exhausting, stressful, and (often) deceitful. It’s also risky – when people feel uncertain about you, they’re more likely to start distrusting anything you do or say.

To be your authentic self requires honesty, vulnerability, and courage – and it’s also incredibly rewarding.

There will be times when your words and actions don’t align with your values. You'll make mistakes, but as you get more in touch with your authentic self, you will recognize the misalignments more quickly. When these disconnects happen, apologize to yourself or to whomever you hurt, and let it go. There's no sense in holding onto pain or feelings that sabotage your journey. Correct yourself and get back on course. Be forgiving.

One of the things I personally practice that enhances authenticity is to choose “discomfort over discontentment.” For example, when fear arises, it can feel uncomfortable and to avoid discomfort we can distract or push away how we really feel and what we really need—but this is ultimately never satisfying.

There is a risk involved when we put ourselves out there personally and professionally. However, if we don’t honor our true feelings and needs, they will eventually leak out when we sometimes least expect it and cause harm to oneself and others. The more we practice authenticity, the easier it becomes to live and lead from this place.

Stop People Pleasing

Don't seek validation. Let go of the need to prove yourself to others. You do not need validation from others to prove your worthiness; even from loved ones. No one or nothing can offer you the authentication you long for, other than yourself. True validation comes from the core of your being.

Are you hard on yourself, always striving for “perfection”? Do you compare yourself to others and either get discouraged or quit?

Judgment is like fear in that it can quickly extinguish your inner light. Comparing yourself to others and harshly judging yourself only slows the process of discovering your authentic-self and finding your purpose.